July 17, 2002

In case you've been wondering, mega-mogul David Geffen never did return my call about using the beach at his spread in Malibu. I promised I'd be in his front door and out on the sand in no time at all, but he didn't even have the decency to call back.

The beaches of California are legally owned by the public, as I pointed out in January. But Geffen and other seaside dwellers--including his DreamWorks SKG partners Steven Spielberg and Jeffrey Katzenberg--have had a "Keep Out" sign up for years.

And now Geffen, a man long associated with liberal causes, has sued the state and the nonprofit group Access for All, trying to block their efforts to open the beaches to the common man. "These Democrats are a bunch of hypocrites," said Access for All President Steve Hoye. He noted that billionaire Democratic Party fund-raisers Eli Broad and Haim Saban, neighbors of Geffen, tried to keep their digs private by buying a nearby parcel for use as a sort of Riffraff Beach.

"It's a class issue and it's about privilege," said Hoye. "It's about these people with their money and their beach wanting to keep it to themselves and keep out ordinary people."

When I saw that Geffen and the city of Malibu had filed suit together, making the same old misleading argument that the area can't reasonably accommodate public use, I figured it was all over. Geffen has enough money to keep this thing tied up in court until Adam Sandler makes a movie I pay to see.

But then, while perusing the geffen.com Web site, I got an idea.

The bands on that site include Sheryl Crow, Sting and U2. And what do those acts have in common?

A social conscience.

If the cause is to feed the hungry, fight injustice or save the planet in the grand tradition of Live Aid or Farm Aid, you can probably count on those artists to show up and sing their hearts out.

So why not a concert to liberate the beaches of Malibu?

Geffen sold the music portion of his empire, and he has nothing to do with any of those bands. But he built his substantial fortune, in part, on the backs of socially conscious crusaders like Peter Gabriel, Jackson Browne and Joni Mitchell, who wrote the famous "Big Yellow Taxi" lyric: "They paved paradise, they put up a parking lot."

Well, guess what, Joni?

They stole paradise, they put up a country club. It's high time we got it back.

My plan is to hold the event on the pier in the People's Republic of Santa Monica, perhaps as early as August. Proceeds can go to the legal defense fund of Access for All, the modest for-the-people outfit that Geffen--a billionaire several times over--is attempting to crush like a cockroach.

"We'll definitely have to raise some dollars to defend ourselves," says Hoye, who suggested adding Don Henley to the concert bill.

Not a bad idea. The former Eagle tried to save Walden Pond, so there's a good chance he'll be interested in rescuing a public beach from the clutches of these champagne-sipping pirates.

Henley is also one of countless musicians who have tangled with Geffen in bitter business feuds. Some of the details are in Tom King's "The Operator," a book The Times called a "chronicle of greed and misanthropy." Geffen had cat fights with Bob Dylan, Elton John, Cher and Neil Young, among others.

This is their chance to get back at him.

I've already gotten word to representatives of Sting, Sheryl Crow, U2, Peter Gabriel, Jackson Browne and Joni Mitchell, inviting them to come together once more, for the people, in the name of equal opportunity.

In 1983, Geffen got permission to remodel his beach digs.

Any idea how?

He promised to create a walkway for public access to the beach.

But when John Q. Public showed up with his family on a hot summer day, Mr. Liberal Do-Gooder told him to get lost. And then, when he feared he might not get his way, he did exactly what you'd expect a guy like him to do.

He sued.

Where's Bono now? Isn't the U2 front man done saving Africa?

It's time for Sting to put another message in a bottle.

I'm going to call Los Lobos, too, and Ozomatli, a couple of L.A. bands. The latter has an activism icon on its Web site with links to 11 causes, including Women in Prison, Revolutionary Worker and United Farm Workers. How about making it a dozen?

"We could call the concert Give Back Our Sand," said Hoye.

Yes. But in the tradition of Live Aid and Farm Aid, we could also go with Sand Aid. If anyone comes up with a better name, the prize is a backstage pass. And I'll share producer credit with whoever writes the best parody of "Big Yellow Taxi."

Pardon us, Joni, but instead of "Hey, farmer, farmer, put away that DDT," how about:

*

Hey mogul, mogul, put away

that lock and key.

You stole the best beaches,

Fenced them off from my friends

and from me.

Don't it always seem to go

That you don't know what

you've got till it's gone.

They stole paradise.

They put up a country club.

*

Steve Lopez writes Sunday, Wednesday and Friday. Reach him at steve.lopez@latimes.com.